I have issues with England, lets face it, I’m not going to be heartbroken that they’ve gone out of the cup, I am however pissed off that as I’m writing this Mexico are losing 3-0 to Argentina.
Earlier today England went 2-0 down to Germany before Matthew Upson, making up for a less than good defensive performance, scored a goal to make them only a goal behind. Then Frank Lampard scored a goal that was disallowed, despite that a blind man could have seen that it was miles across the line.
I’m not an England fan, not by a long shot, but I do believe that disallowing that goal made England’s chances of going through to the quarter finals of the World Cup slim to none. Of course, England were mainly shit anyhow, but that’s beside the point.
Fast forward a couple of hours and once again the officials are proven to be one of the biggest let downs of this World Cup when Argentina were allowed a goal that was so far offside every single person on the field, in the stadium and watching around the world stared on in disbelief as the referee blew his whistle for a goal. Mexico are loosing 3-0 as we speak, that first goal being the main reason as to why they’re currently tumbling out of the tournament.
Sepp Blatter and FIFA need to start taking responsibility for their part in slowly ruining world football. We live in a world where technology rules the roost, yet they refuse to consider goal-line technology or watching replays before allowing difficult decisions to be made. I bet the referee in the Mexico match would have loved to have that technology be available as he was forced to watch the replay on the big screens and suffer the anger of the Mexicans as he realized what he had done.
The ball in this year’s tournament is a joke. The referees may as well consist of a line-up from the Muppet’s, and Sepp Blatter. I do not hate a lot of people, but that man’s only contribution to World Football has been allegations of fraud along with suggestions of tighter tops and shorter shorts in women’s football.
It’s time to start again FIFA, get rid of the bad seeds and sort it out, or you will only succeed in one thing, and that is distancing football fans everywhere further and further away for the sport.
P.S. Mexico just scored, COME ON, just need two more for extra time.
When England played their match against Slovenia yesterday England had to win to get through the group, and thanks to a goal from Jermain Defoe they made it through by the skin of their teeth. Although it wasn’t a hundred percent clear by then who England would face in the knock-out stages, anyone could make an educated guess that it would turn out to be Germany.
Now I’m all for the positivity and disillusion that comes with being a football supporter. It doesn’t matter who you support, you are always in danger of falling into the trap of getting hopeful and thinking that they can do better than they logically are capable of. Being a United fan, I’m obviously spoilt in that department. Considering the history of my club I feel like I do not have the right to be disappointed when we do not win anything, but obviously I always am. England fans however should be used to it by now.
It’s been 44 years since England won the World Cup, 44 years of shattered dreams and blame being passed around quicker than syphilis in a whorehouse. This is me promising you that it will be at least another four years before England win the World Cup again, most likely more. In the meanwhile, and especially if Franz Beckenbauer’s comments are getting to you, you just keep telling yourself that we won the war.
Oh Terry, poor poor John Terry. Not only has his attempt of mutiny bore no fruits, but his manager has basically called him a slimy dickhead (all about reading between the lines), and he has now made a public apology in the shape of an interview with the Daily Mail. Now I could be serious about this, I could analyse, write articulately about the last few days and dissect just what is happening within the England camp, but lets face it there are thousands of serious people out there, and it’d be kind of boring if we were all trying to be the next Patrick Barclay or Martin Samuel, in my case it would also be kind of impossible anatomically.
John Terry should have been dropped from the squad, his antics at Chelsea has shown what a tosser he is. He’s been given free reigns at the club that pays his wages and the heads of anyone who doesn’t bow down to King Terry has been rolling freely, yet Capello thought he could control him. It’s like looking after your friend’s spoilt child for the day and assuming that the dummy won’t be spat out the moment you say “no”, and lets face it, Johnny boy does nothing quite as well as spitting that dummy out.
Wayne Bridge should be in the squad, John Terry should be strung up by his balls and have rotten fruit thrown at his head, the one he doesn’t seem to use that is. I’m not the crusader of monogamy, lets be honest, if it wasn’t for the whole religion bit of it I’d be quite happy living in some kind of crazy Mormon camp, however there has to be limits and John Terry crossed the border into stupid land. So here’s a crazy idea Capello, why not just send Terry home? It may be a belated fuck you to the man Chelsea fans seem to believe is the “only England captain”, but perhaps you could save some face before England go tumbling out tomorrow. Not that I’m saying they can’t go through… But in case they don’t, it may be worth trying to save yourself from complete humiliation. Besides, I’m sure JT wants to get back to London and Stamford Bridge where he could commit genocide and still be seen as the second coming of Christ.
Whilst David James had a pop at Capello in a rather understated way Friday night, the unhappy “former” captain John Terry did not take a leaf out of the same book when giving a press conference yesterday. Firstly, Terry should not have been doing the press conference, Steven “kisses the badge on his chest before handing in his transfer request” Gerrard should have had the honour. Of course as per usual the Liverpool and supposed England Captain displayed his lack of backbone by not insisting on doing the press conference. Instead we got the man, the legend, the adulterous scum bag that is John “Cries when missing a penalty” Terry.
Now I think Terry said a lot of sensible things in his press conference, he admitted England were not good enough and that there were problems. Sadly his words of wisdom were overshadowed by the blatant attempt at re-enacting the Mutiny on the Bounty, with Terry casting himself as Fletcher Christian. Sadly for him the other sailors decided to jump ship and not join Terry in the revolt he was promising for the team meeting that was scheduled for last night.
Terry is obviously still angry that he lost his captaincy after he slipped over and his cock happened to land in Wayne Bridge’s ex-partner, and it’s simply another thing added to the sinking ship that is England. Of course if rumours are to believed, the worst is yet to come as it has been suggested that John Terry has also impregnated a minor and that this is supposed to break the news in the next few days… Normally I’m not one for buying into rumours, but when it comes to John Terry, nothing would surprise me.
“Chelsea wherever you may be, don’t leave your wife with John Terry… ”
What I’d give to be a fly on the wall for the England match against Slovenia on Wednesday.
Now I think I have made it quite clear that I do not support England in the World Cup, I’d quite like them to go out at the group stages so that Rooney can go home and get rested for the coming season, however I am very amused at the state of affairs within the England camp.
After the abysmal or amusing (depending on who you are) display against Algeria on Friday, Jermaine Defoe and David James were heard in interviews on Radio 5 live. Now whilst Defoe made a point out of saying how great the team is, how many world class players England have and how hard they worked (what had he been smoking, and can someone PLEASE supply me with some of it?), David James was slightly more honest, and by honest I mean slightly controversial.
David James first gave credit to the Algerian side for not wanting to lose so much it made the match a “dire spectacle”, something that he thought had been quite the trend this World Cup. The interviewer went on to tell James that the manager seems to think that England are still playing with too much pressure, to which James simply replied “Does he. Ok.” When she attempted to to ask the England goalkeeper if he agreed with this James once again said nothing except that Algeria worked hard to close England down and not give them any chances and seemed uninterested in creating chances for themselves, his most challenging part of the match having been a Gareth Barry backpass. We go on to hear how James only found out he was playing against Algeria five minutes before he got on the bus, sounding less then happy when explaining that such tactics are the prerogative of the manager. James may not have said anything that sounds too outragious, however his unhappiness adds fuel to claims that the England camp are everything but happy.
The interview in it’s full can be heard here and is about 1/3 into the programme. The beginning is worth a listen too as one of the “educated” callers go onto a rant about how England should sack Capello and put David Beckham in charge. England fans are nothing if not amusing.
Well, look at the bright side guys and girls, it could be worse, you could be French.
Which is probably what Wayne Rooney would have said had he not loved his national side with a passion that the team and its fans does NOT deserve.
Instead he said “Nice to see your own fans booing you. That’s what loyal support is.” In those few words Rooney summed up one reason as to why I never could and never would get behind England. England’s performance was abysmal, it was probably worse than that. There was no passion in that team, there was no want or desire to win. The manager took off Aaron Lennon, the one player who seemed to be desperate for his team to do well, to replace him with the midget that is Shaun Wright-Phillips, who will only ever be a world class player in the eyes of his somewhat biased adopted father. Which leads me to believe that Capello, despite the ignorance of England fans, was never the saviour that they expected him to be.
Wayne Rooney will probably be blamed in part for England’s exit from the World Cup, and the exit will come, that I’d be willing to bet a lot of money on. West Ham’s Rob Green will be haunted by the mistake he made in the first match, perhaps more so by his own conscience than that of the England fans, but Rooney will be the man with most of the blame because he didn’t score enough goals, because he wasn’t passionate enough. Why? Because from the beginning of England’s warm up matches all that has been spoken of is the fact that Rooney’s temper is going to cost England the World Cup. He has been told to tone it down, but what the ignorant fools that watch, fantasy manage and boo England do not realise is that Rooney isn’t some miserable twat whose temper gets him the odd yellow card, and perhaps too many red cards earlier on in his career. Rooney has something that England fans fail to recognize because they haven’t seen it this millenium. It’s called passion you bunch of overbearing, self-centered, pathetic excuses of football fans.
It’s what Psycho and Gazza had, but that no one questioned back then. What changed? 1998. Beckham got sent off, and got all the blame for a terrible performance. That’s when I lost my respect for England, and its fans. That’s when you “fans” lost the right to call yourself supporters, and it’s all been downhill since then.
Burning dummies of Beckham, then cheering like there was no Tomorrow when he scored THAT free kick against Greece. That sums up England fans. Hypocrites. There are some grounds in England where you have come to expect hearing fans whose teams are in the top ten or even top five of the Premiership booing their players and team, and it seems those same people follow England, boo England. Which at least makes them consistent hypocrites.
You don’t boo your team, you don’t sneer at your players. You’re not going to encourage them to play better by booing them, and even if you may be feeling a bit pissed off that you’re watching a team that clearly does not give a fuck, guess what, that’s England, YOU decided to support them, so perhaps you should consider doing just that.
I hate England, I hate their fans. I hate John Terry, I despise Ashley Cole, I feel violent tendencies towards Frank Lampard and Steven Gerrard. I’m not willing to change my opinion of those vile creations of humanity just to support England, I’d rather be ravaged by hungry lions at London Zoo. I’m just glad I figured all of this out a long time ago, because I really would have hated ending up looking like a dick head like the rest of you do. The fans, the tabloids, you’re all pathetic. The team itself is pathetically overrated and lacking in all aspects.
So really, feel free, and stick your fucking England up your arse.
A quick walkthrough of the teams in this year’s World Cup, simply because I have nothing better to do.
Algeria: No chance, but they’re generally not too bad to watch.
Argentina: Have a chance, although in my opinion probably won’t win it. Nor do we want them to win it, never mind the Hand of God, if the Argies win it Maradona’s threatened to show us the nuts and spanner of God.
Brazil: Always a contender. Always a bunch of cheating bastards who for some reason seem to get away with murder with the referees. May win it, but probably won’t deserve it.
Cameroon: I’d love for them to do well, sadly they probably won’t do much.
Chile: People won’t expect much from them as they generally don’t know much about them, they may surprise you though.
Ivory Coast: Their star (wanker) Didier Drogba may be returning despite having a broken arm. Which pretty much says all about how good they are without him doesn’t it.
Denmark: Don’t make me laugh. Although, they’ve surprised us before, of course, that’s like nearly two decades ago.
England: Sorry people, but won’t happen. No, really. It’s not going to happen. If it does I’ll eat my hat. One of you will have to buy me a hat first though.
France: They’re shit. They’re manager is doing his best to ensure they remain shit, and to be honest I have a bigger chance of winning it taking on all the top teams, on my own.
Germany: Hell. No.
Greece: Bless them, but no.
Honduras: It’d be brilliant if they did, but sadly just because you’re in the World Cup it doesn’t mean you have a chance at winning it.
Italy: Usually do well in the World Cup. Shame their a bunch of facist, corrupt bastards. Come on, you know you’re all thinking it.
Japan: Not even if the other teams defended as badly as the yanks defended Pearl Harbour. (Heel heat)
North Korea: No.
South Korea: Nope. Although will probably do better than their Northern “friends”.
Mexico: Well I’m cheering for them, although not that hopeful. They’re the underdogs though!
The Netherlands: Haha. Hahaha. Yeah, right.
New Zealand: I believe one website, may have been Betfair, is giving you a 1000/1 on the Kiwis to win. I’d say it’s worth putting a quid on it, although you’d probably need a nuclear disaster affecting everyone but their team for the bet to go through.
Nigeria: Could put up some tough matches, but it won’t help them much further than the first group play if they get through.
Paraguay: Make an educated guess at how Uruguay will do, then imagine half of that and you’ll have Paraguay.
Portugal: Well, they do have Ronaldo. However, that won’t be enough and they’ll be left disappointed again. Of course a few winks here and there could lighten the whole cup up.
Serbia, Slovakia and Slovenia: No, no and no. Or maybe njet.
South Africa: There is no such thing as poetic justice.
Spain: Seems the favourites, however, it remains to be seen if they can live up to the high expectations.
Switzerland: Neutral countries rarely win anything. Except for “lost” Nazi gold.
Uruguay: They’ll do OK, no better, no worse. Along with France, Mexico and South Africa they probably make up the toughest and least predictable group.
USA: They call it “soccer”, if they ever win the World Cup I think football as a sport may as well be retired.
So basically… We may end up with no winners! COME ON MEXICO!!
Is kind of how I’ve been lately really. I’m afraid life’s been rather busy lately, and it’s stopped me giving my opinion of all things great and wonderful that have been happening in the world.
There’s the weather. Pollen infestation one day, hail and misery the next. If there is a God, which I am pretty sure there isn’t, you are in so much trouble for messing me about the way you have. I wish for once England like most of the world would follow the logic of having four seasons in a year, not four season in two fucking weeks.
There’s the resignation of David Laws, who has retsigned after it became public he spent £40 000 paying his boyfriend’s rent. Well, his fella has to have one hell of a pad is all I’m saying, talk about being looked after well. Give it three months and I reckon most Lib Dem Government officials will have “resigned” due to simillar reason. Not nessessarily because they are guilty, which Laws blatantly is, but because it’d be the easiest way for Cameron to ensure his government remains a Tory powerpoint. Lets face it, at the moment it’s pretty much like watching the KKK and a Gospel choir playing happy families, and there’s no way in hell that’ll last that long. Especially not five years, however much Cameron may want to continue doing Clegg and his mates up the arse.
England beat Bangladesh in their first test match. Well, who gives a shit, watching cricket’s like cutting your wrists then watching them bleed out slowly and think of it as entertainment.
Alicia Keys is pregnant, and getting married. Jealous.
The World Cup’s coming up, and England needed Japan to score two own goals to ensure they won their friendly the other day. Yes people, we’re so good we need Japan to score on our behalf. I’m sure that’ll win us the World Cup… really… Bunch of naive twats. When we go out you’re all going to blame Rooney for not running enough, or not scoring enough, so how about you stop cheering for the player who you jeer for most of the year and just start booing him now. That way he may realise that United really is greater than England. By a landslide people.
Dennis Hopper’s passed away. Gutted. For once I’m not going to make any jokes.
In other news, we’re still in a recession, the country is run by worms who are more worthless than a lab rat refusing to test the newest shade in lipstick and I have a bad ankle.
Till next time boys and girl,